Girls and an Imaginary Girlfriend

I am so incredibly proud of my class today. They had there Moving Up! Ceremony, and I feel this sense of accomplishment for them and myself. I can only imagine what the parents are feelings. Anyway, two things made me laugh out loud today:

1) It is tradition after the ceremony for the kids to change in designated rooms (separating boys and girls, of course) and for the class to go to a pool party. My boys were waiting out in the hallway, and I noticed they looked angry. When I asked them what's going on, they responded "Miss F, why does it take so long for the girls to change? What on earth are they doing in there? It is hot, and we want to go in the pool. Can we leave without them?" Umm...of course not! I told them that the girls had more things to do to get ready and that they should get used it.

2) This is the one day of the year that I turn a blind eye to seeing electronic on the bus to the pool party. When the boys got off the bus, they were all crowding around an ipod (the one that looks like an iphone) and laughing. Since 10 year old boys can't seem to be discrete, I went over to see what the fuss was about. I totally expected to see an inappropriate picture of some kind. I asked the owner of the ipod to talk to me on the side. It turned out that he made himself "an imaginary" cartoon girlfriend from a computer program. She looked like a south park like character. After I looked at the picture, the boy and I had this interaction:
Me: So, who is this?
Boy (huge smile): My imaginary girlfriend....I made her.
Me: Oh, that's interesting
Boy: Yeah, she's great. Do you like her?
Me: Well, I guess. Does she have a name?
Boy: Umm...hmm (has an expression of deep thought)...well, I've just always called her Girlfriend. Am I in trouble?
Me: No, honey, I was just wondering what all the fuss was about.
Boy: Well, the other boys in our class were laughing, but I think they're just jealous.

Wow! I know now why I write more about boys. They are so ridiculously funny.

On another note, I think parents should stop sending their geriatric parents as "chaperones" for school functions. When you can't see or hear, you are not that much of a help.

Treehouse Man & Some Casts

This is a crazy time of year for me because it is the end of school and the start of camp. At my school, I have to completely pack up my room. As a department chair, I am preparing two "training" sessions. I'm also finishing report cards, preparing lessons, going to camp meetings and, of course, I got summoned to jury duty (I'm all for being a good citizen, but seriously?). I was smart enough to bring journals to grade as I sat in that ridiculous waiting area. Here are two entries that made me smile. Although sometimes I think these writing pieces are only funny to me because I know the children and can imagine them actually saying these things, but I hope some readers out there enjoy them (let me know with a comment :)). I especially like this student's style because it totally matches the way he actually speaks and tells stories.

"A treehouse! A treehouse! Sure, my dad has built us stuff before, but nothing like this! He even did this all by himself! You know what that means, no help! My mom wouldn't even help him. He even might add a slide someday. Don't get me wrong and all. I'm usually not this hyper, but in my opinion this is something to hype about. I mean, not everyone has a dad who will take this own time to build his kids a tree house. I might be scared of heights but I'm going to forget about that fear when I'm in that treehouse. I might even forget my fear entirely. You know, I'm thinking of renaming my dad: The Treehouse Man!"

"My name is Mike, and I've had twelve casts! Now, I know what you are thinking. What on earth does this kid do in his free time?! Well, the answer to that is : falling off monkey bars, tripping over tree roots and a whole lot of toe-walking. Casts 1,2,3: When I was three, I was trying to do a trick that goes like this: step 1: get on the monkey bars, step 2:swing really high off the monkey bars, step 3: land on your feet! I screwed up on#3. That little incident landed me in the hospital with three casts at one time! Cast 4: Everyone loves camp, and so do I. But, I used to like it more. If you are wondering why I don't like camp so much, here's my story: my friend Seth and I were playing a game called "Steal The Counselors Hat". Apparently, karma decided then to visit me. While I was running from my counselor, I tripped on a tree root and smashed my arm into the ground, leaving my arm in yet another cast. Cast 5,6,7,8,9,10,11 &12: ever since I was in kindergarten I would walk on my toes. No harm you say? Think again, reader! Your hamstrings get super tight. These casts on my legs were the only other choice besides surgery. My advice is to avoid all of these things."

It's almost Moving Up! I'm going to miss these little guys.

June?!

I'm actually doing it. A co-worker convinced me to entrust my little ones with them, so I can sleep in a little a try to get rid of this cold. I wanted to believe it was allergies, but as the anti-histamines proved, I'm not allergic to anything. The truth is I think my body is responding to the end of the year craziness in fifth grade and my tendency to over-commit myself. I also noticed that the more stressed I am, the less I notice funny events or saying around me. One of the reasons I started this blog in the first place, aside from sharing some of these ridiculous experiences, is to force myself to notice as much as possible all of the funny and clever things the kids say and do.

Tonight I was grading their tests on the systems of the body. In response to the question, "what is the function of the immune system?" A boy wrote, "The function of the immune system is to fight off sperms that try to harm the body." I guess sperms and germs sound too similar for him. Or, maybe he recently learned about sex? Oh well, I had to mark that one wrong.

Another response that I found cute (and actually understand HOW the child came up with this) is in answer to the question: "why does air enter and leave the body when the diaphram relaxes and contracts?" The correct answer is that it creates a vacuum in the abdominal cavity. Instead, he wrote, "the diaphram is our body's vacuum cleaner without electricity." Umm...I think we had a misunderstanding...